I was looking through some old papers today and found a stream of consciousness I write about 5 years ago, around my 20th year or so in this current primate body.  I thought I would type it up for my more reprodicible files.  It seems fitting because it seems to have relevance to many a vein of my current thought involving the Project, and it sub-category, the Game.  It also has a strange quality to it, pre-dating any of my study of buddhism though some of the concepts touched on are close to aspects of the Heart Sutra.  The part that caught my attention while I was flipping through these pages was the mention of "singularity" though this piece also predates any study I have done on the concept of technological singularity, or Mckenna's work with the Hyperdimensional object at the end of time.

At some point I think I also need to do a short article on this "strange attractor" of both history and consciousness, in specific relation to the symbol/number of 89, the black hole, and also AL/LA as another symbol of the same in an alternate way.  The concept of transcendent Nothing or Voidness was a large object of my meditations around the time of this stream of writing, and currently 89 has been on my mind quite a bit as a concept (or a lack of all concept... "there is factor infinite and unknown...")

Anyways, enjoy.

"Merging in and out of a single singularity, an infinite pulsing nothing that expands to all degrees of awareness.  Chaotic mingling intermixing in a germ structure of boundless light, throbbing with realty.  Every emotion is an energy signal out onto this vast web; every idea is teeming with possibility, with beauty, with joy.  The sorrow, the pleasure, the weeping all adds to this expanding net of light.  We are all part of it, all inside it, we all are it.  A facet of a crystal refracting light into never-ending shades of possibility.

Who are you to retain your individuality, who are you to struggle against its current?  When you give up all struggle, when you let go of habit and bias, programming and stereotype, self, individuality, consciousness, you will view yourself as this web, and you will see everyone around you as yourself, another piece of yourself.  If you let go, you will realize you are the whole process. You are creation, you are eternity.  You do not need to learn this because you know it already.  Deep down, past all these experiences, past all this pain, past all the pain, lies and deception, past all the hurt and loneliness sits a child, afraid and waiting.  This Child is Eternity, this Child a clear and shining light, a weaver of this web.  You are this child, and this world is your toy.

Do not think, for you can not think.  Think you to survive death?  HA!  The part of you that will survive death is barely even alive now.  Do you say you know yourself, do you think you are conscious?  The part of you that thinks that is the part of you that will die, that is the trickery of your reason trying to usurp power.

All you have to do is remember.  All you ever were, are and will be is right here, in this present.  This moment is all that ever has been and all that ever will be.  I could tell you of this Golden Moment, but to speak of it is absurd.  I should not even mention it.

Now look around you, around YOU and all you are… is this you?  Is this what you are?  A bunch of experiences, a corporeal egregore of your likes and dislikes, your friends, your family, your lovers?  This is not you!  This is but a dad skin shed by the snake of self.  These things are as lifeless as a reflection in a mirror.  The only reality is self as no-self.  The real you is nothing; it is that primordial nothing that never existed.  It never was, is not and never will be. This now is a dream, the dream of Nothing.  We are all actors in a play that was started by ourselves…

Hasn’t this already happened before? Where was I then…. oh yes… chaos is your life.  The universe was born in chaos, exists in chaos and will end in chaos.  You are chaos.

In the beginning was a void, free of all attributes, all characteristics, all stereotypes or conceptions or beliefs. This void is Self.  Free from anything to restrict it or label it. This formlessness is the archetype of all Form.  The void that is named is not a true void.  As such, I can not speak of IT because IT is not THAT which I say.  I can not speak of IT for speech is blasphemy to it.  All words are false in the face of truth.  If Truth does exist, it exists in silence.  Silence of mind, silence of the body, silence of the soul.  Lie still thy being and be silent.  Pure folly is the key to initiation. “The fool who persist in his folly becomes wise.”

We each are the void, all things are equally the center.  In a universe that is infinite, the center is equally everywhere.  You are the center viewing itself. You are the ever becoming ONE.  How can this be?  How can this not be!

All that needs to be said is said in silence.  Do not listen to that false “I” that tries to assume control. Move beyond, dear child, move beyond and exceed to more and you will arrive at your destination for you will have become the destination.  The only way is the self, you are the way.

The Tao that can be spoken of is not the eternal Tao. Remember to forget… the Tao is not the ONLY way, it is THE way.  IT is the way.

TAG!  You’re IT!"